The Great College Expulsion of Jamie

 Here's a funny short story about when Jamie got kicked out of college!

The Great College Expulsion of Jamie

It all started with a simple misunderstanding. Well… a series of misunderstandings.

I, Jamie, was a model college student—if the model was slightly dented, missing a few pieces, and held together with duct tape and bad decisions.

The beginning of the end happened when my roommate, Kevin, bet me $20 that I couldn’t steal the Dean’s prized goldfish, Mr. Bubbles, and return him unharmed by morning. Obviously, this was a challenge I had to accept.

Operation Bubble Heist went perfectly—until it didn’t. I successfully snuck into the Dean’s office (thank you, unlocked window), retrieved Mr. Bubbles, and placed him safely in my dorm room’s Brita pitcher. Unfortunately, in my excitement, I left behind my phone… which had my student ID sticker on the back. Rookie mistake.

The next morning, the Dean called an emergency assembly. “Whoever took Mr. Bubbles, return him immediately and no one gets expelled,” he boomed.

At that exact moment, Kevin—being an absolute menace—thought it would be hilarious to lift the Brita pitcher in the air and announce, “ALL HAIL THE RETURN OF MR. BUBBLES!”

Cue gasps. Cue the Dean’s face turning an alarming shade of red. Cue my realization that maybe—just maybe—this wasn’t my best idea.

I tried to explain. “It was an academic experiment?” No dice.

So yeah, I got expelled. But not before I made history as the only student to be escorted off campus while holding a Brita pitcher with a goldfish inside.

On the bright side, Kevin still owed me $20.

What do you think? Want any tweaks? 😆

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